As some of you may know, I am booked to sign my latest book at Langton's Bookshop. Langtons is my local and preferred bookshop, and I often go in there just to have a chat with Jon Foulkes, for which I'm sure I must apologise to him. It can't be good for business. Anyway, there is now a sign up in the shop giving details of my reading on July the 14th. Also, recently, every time I've been in I have asked if anyone has phoned up to enquire about the reading. Apparently no one has. That's so discouraging. Indifference is the enemy of art.
Anyway, apparently, a great many people have seen the sign in the shop advertising the appearance of Quentin S Crisp and have complained that it is false advertising, because I am not the 'real' Quentin Crisp. If any of those people are reading this now – and everyone else, please forgive my vulgarity – you are a tedious cunt! I AM the real Quentin Crisp. How many times do I have to explain this? I've even explained it before on this very blog.
However, this controversy has led to a conversation between myself and Jon on the matter of whether I should use a pen name. It is certainly ironic that I should have to change my real name because Dennis Pratt changed his name to mine. In fact, Jon suggested I could change my name to Dennis Pratt. But no, there are very good reasons that Dennis changed his name in the first place. He knew very well that my name was better. However, Jon does seem to think I might have a better chance of finding a major publisher if I use a pen name. Probably because publishers are mainly of the same ilk as the tedious cunts who complain about my name being false advertising.
This is something that has occurred to me before, but I have quite simply never been able to think of a pen name with which I am satisfied. Then there's the fact that there are now people who have read the works I have published so far and are eagerly waiting for more. Jon laughed at this suggestion, which was very remiss of him, but it's true, damn it! I'm even mentioned in Wikipedia, the online encyclopaedia.
However, I have decided that, because I am always wrong, it's probably best to throw the question open to the public. So, I want you all to think of a good pen name for me. Male, female or unisex – I don't mind! If there is one that I decide actually to use – even if only experimentally – then I will send the author of that name a free copy of my latest book, Rule Dementia!. Also, I will be his or her friend forever. However, if all the names are crap, I won't send a prize to anyone.
Now, if you need anything to go on, I suggest you read something I've written. My latest story, 'The Fairy Killer' is currently available free online as a sample. Also, if you need a visual clue, well, there are not many photos of me online, but I'll try and find one to link to.
As usual, I expect there to be zero response to this entry.
Thank you very much.
Mycroft Mandot Net
is my new entry. Both conceivably a name and a website, with Mandot being similar to French surnames, as well as being a joke on our fullness as Man and our existential loneliness as a dot, with Mycroft linking to net because Mycroft was Sherlock Holmes’s older brother, whose brain had a net-like (called web in the books, I think) quality of absorbing and synthesizing all the knowledge the London government has; also, the website would be your croft, ie My Croft.
Well said, and, in answer to your question, that’s what I’d like to know, too.
If I seem a little touchy on the subject it’s because I’m tired of people refusing to believe me when I tell them my name. People can be very rude about it, too. I’ve had people hang up on me and so on when I try to buy tickets by phone, when I’m looking for jobs and so on.
Before 9/11, or rather, on that very day, I was at my family home in Devon. My mother was worried because she was about to fly to America. I was just back in England getting a visa in order to go and study in Japan.
I must say, the idea of a name striking fear into people does seem rather extreme, though, as you say, it is a very novelistic phenomenon.
HI Q,
You will always be Quentin S Crisp to me no matter what you change your name to.
Why change it?? Let them fear the wrath of Q !
I do understand the hardships surrounding a name.. BELIEVE ME !
I just say … HEY IT”S ME DEAL WITH IT!!!!!
My sister has the name of a well known singer… and when she calls and states her name.. they all think its the singer LOL…
I say it’s their problem. If you love your name or pen name keep it, let the other one change his name.
Just my 2 cents Q …
Happy to know you are ok 🙂
Hugs to ya,
Eve
I believe you’re the real supernatural fiction writer.
What’s the problem peoople find on believing in it?
Best,
Dan
Hello Eve. Thank you for your two cents. I live on such donations.
I suppose if I am attached to my name it is precisely because of the ordeals I have had to suffer for it, particularly at school, but also in adult life.
Unfortunately the other chap can’t change his name now, as he died a few years back. I wonder how he would have reacted if I met him and introduced myself.
Yes, my mother did fly anyway.
I haven’t actually been on the underground since the seventh, I think. I wonder if I will feel any different when I next use it.
Why don’t you use Q. S. Crisp as your nom-de-plume? That way you are still yourself, and following in a long line of literary greats with two initials, such as T.S.Eliot, W.H.Auden, A.E.Housman, H.P.Lovecraft and P.G.Tips.
Cool. I love the name Mycroft (and the character as well) and I have no clue why one never meets anyone called that name. If I have a son, they will be Mycroft!
Thank you, Will. You are the first entrant in this competition, and may even win by default.
That’s a very post-modernist sort of idea, with all sorts of implications about author identity. I’m just worried it might be a bit of a mouthful. Perhaps I should try and buy up some very short, snappy domain name in a similar vein.
HI Q,
I am sure he would be HONORED by you wearing his name 🙂
I am living in hell with my name being Fatimah Abdullah in these times YIKESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSs… I make people shake can you believe that??? look at my profile photo do I look like a terroist????
I can’t find a really good job due to my name. I lost friends long time ones too when I changed my name…
I am the same person or even a better person since I changed my life and name but no one judges me on my deeds only my name.
I love your name and really I feel it fits you even if I never met you.
Q are U
as Eve is ME
Hugs
Eve
HI Q,
Did your Mom fly anyway?
ON 9-11 I was working in my business with then my Egyptian husband and I had accounts to service close to New York City.
I changed my route for that day and did stores away from NYC however, the sight of him made people shutter. I know he was handsome however, it wasn’t for that reason 🙁
After 9-11 people paid more attention to my name and when signing my orders they were amazed they didnt realize it before .
Oh well I am use to it now. life goes on.
Hugs,
Eve
Hello Eve.
So, did you change your name from Fatimah Abdullah or to it? I presume the latter, though you sign as ‘Eve’.
Well, I just wondered.
I’m afraid that much of the time, terrorism seems to bring out the worst in people. I would hope that a sense of community becomes more important, but often this seems to be eroded because of exaggerated fears.
I’m going to enter my own competition here.
I keep getting junk e-mail – which, incidentally, I delete without opening – and I often find myself at the ridiculous, made-up names of the people who are supposedly sending this rubbish. However, it occurred to me that I could sift through these names for a nom-de-plume. This morning I wrote down the name ‘Blake Hancock’, which was attached to just such an item of junk e-mail.
Perhaps I shall use it – shades of William Blake, Blake’s 7 and Tony Hancock.
HI Q,
Yes I did change it legally prior before 9-11 20 20 where were you then 🙂
I was Eve before and I use it now since I do have so many problems in life with my name.. Now I get a kick out of it when they see my credit card with the name they look 2 or 3 times 🙂
some times they ask me how long have I been in this country .. DUH ~ look at me !!!! Gesh.
I love my name and the meaning I took it .. the magic surrounding me and the background is enough for a book
I just don’t like being judged due to my name and not based on ME.
It’s not a nice feeling to see people tremble just due to a name.. however, it’s their small minds that cause the trembling not my fierceness.
gracefully yours,
Eve
This is actually a very good pseudonym. To be honest, I doubt I’ll use it, but I love the overdetermined meaning behind it all. I might just be tempted to try it. I’ll let you know if I do.
I suggest you change your name to http://my.opera.com/quentinscrisp/journal
Firstly, anyone writing about you would have to link to you; secondly, you could make a sticky post explaining that you’re not the other QC.
Hello,Yes, I am the very late newcomer to this party, but I have to relate my experiences. When I first heard the name ‘Quentin S. Crisp’ I thought that it sounded vaguely familiar. Being a young American (hmmm… that expression seems familiar) I wasn’t very well acquainted with the older author. When I found Q’s blog I learned about the history of his name and it all became clear. I suggest a pen name derived from your middle name, or possibly just to use a short form like Quincy. Incidentally my name is essentially a pen name, although soon to be a legal one.
Oh my God, I’ve been keeping a blog far too long. How embarrassing. I’ve just read how I ended this entry:As usual, I expect there to be zero response to this entry.What a silly thing to say. What a silly person I am.I’ve actually been thinking about pen names recently. I might use one at some point. It probably won’t involve my middle name.